Other’s opinions do not pay the bills

but they do add a load of setbacks in life in general.

People and their opinions I tell you. You can not breathe without being criticize for it. I am not going to lie I listened to what others  had to say about me. Every negative word said from others stayed with me over the years. Beginning to take words seriously, I wanted to change every ounce of myself just to fit into a crowd. I knew that I was different somehow but I no longer wanted to stand out in a negative way. Well, at the time, I perceived it at as negative but later on I discovered that maybe these things are not so negative.

but I must say..these negative things did not stop me from building insecurities.

How does someone face insecurities all together though? Mainly by defining exactly what insecurity you have and then addressing what caused this insecurity thing to come about.

Insecurities are just a result of things we have  heard and experienced in our lives. You have to figure out what you are insecure about and get over it by finding something positive about it. For instance, I am introverted but there are others just like me in this world. I am not alone what so ever. Actually, being introverted is the norm now. Who isn’t nowadays?  Secondly, write down what you are insecure about and what caused you to be insecure all together. After figuring out what caused those insecurities, you can then face them head on.

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Determine if you are receiving constructive criticism verse a random opinion. You basically need to find clarity if someone is really just  saying something out of their butt because they just feel the urge to do so. Ask questions. Why does this person feel this way? If there is little to no feedback, then someone is just speaking on jealously in their own selves and putting it out on you. In other words, GIRL BYE! Two snaps two circles. Now if this criticism is somewhat helpful, listen to it and apply it to your life.

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People that accept you for  who you are, are the only people you should be concerned about. There are people that love the way you are and do no criticize you for it. You have to literally evaluate the circle of people you associate with. If those people consistently find something wrong with you then may be there is something actually something wrong with them. They may be throwing their own insecurities on you or better yet may just be jealous of something your possess.

jealous

I’ve noticed this over the years. A person will point out something that you have in a negative light just because they want what you have.

which goes into another point, pay attention to a person’s motives

Where are these criticisms coming from? Where is this person’s heart when they speak.  Is it to help me or to bring me down? Oh, and do not forget about those people that just want to give you advice just to get credit for doing something to “help” you/make them feel better about themselves.  Don’t you just hate those kinds of people? Do not let someone use you just to fulfill a good deed for the day. You are not a charity case after all.

but back to what I was saying…

 Then you can further figure out what is best for you at this point.  If you figure out that it is not coming out of love then do not allow these people to continue to be around. Ain’t Nobody got time for that!! That includes family members. (I rather not go further on that because that will be a whole blog in itself. Family members can somewhat be toxic as well.) I am also the queen of letting people go little to no warning. So, I might not be the best person to talk to about letting people go and such. Let’s just say, I do not believe in wasting time what so ever. I do not believe in allowin people to collect space in my life when they do not deserve it. Just saying boo.

Personally, I have learned to not allow things hinder me from my blessings and from blessing others. I do not allow people to steal my joy because they are miserable in their own skin. You should not allow it either. Life is too short to allow others to stop you from being yourself just because they do not accept who you are. Eliminate the dead weight and allow yourself to continue to grow and flourish into the person God intended you to be. Be you. Forget what other’s are saying. Walk into you destiny and keep it moving.

And just remember, opinions do not pay the bills unless it has something to do with your business but other than that opinions do not matter what so ever.

With Love and God Bless,

Jamie Veni

JF3

Photography by Marlon Williams

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